do not expect too much from the end of this poem

**********

jack runs east
towards four no
maybe five forks 
on this road lay
my lair of bones 
with the lights off
above the fields
way uphill there
at this quiet hour 
in that dark house 
they won't notice
red brake lights 
aglow a dead end
while fog pushes  
against the glass 
this warm aether 
I've called down 
for us just this once
I am not confident
about being a wife
maybe it's because of
my Southern Illinois
White Trash Instincts
in an open hearted 
delirium high off of
glyphosate or whatever
they are spraying the  
corn with these days 
but I have found 
myself alone with 
nothing but time 
racing up and down 
I-55 considerate of 
your potential as my
future babydaddy but
only if... in another life
can you find it in your
self to forgive me do
you think we've met 
before will you kneel
a second and pray with
me I know it's all just 
so hard to believe but
sweetheart this time I 
really am trying my best.
 
I promise. 

xxxx,

Maude